| Alright kids, so how about this is my second entry this month. I bet some of you are just so eager to read what I have to type... just kidding... Well I am back in Michigan and there is snow freaking everywhere and I have to say, I LOVE IT. I went to church today and arrived late because I am an idiot and I set my alarm an hour later than I meant to... but that's okay, I didn't miss the preaching. Jesus did some talking today and I got rebuked, but it's all good because I am learning. I'm just REALLY glad that his love is unchanging (he had to remind me of that again) and that he doesn't give up on us when we are CONSTANTLY complete idiots. I'm beginning to understand the implications of us being "true" Israel... it's a good thing because we are all God's chosen, but we're also all idiots who keep making the same mistakes and worshiping stupid little golden calves and calling them Yahweh and then getting seriously rebuked about it. And even after all that, God says "hey, I haven't given up on you, just LEARN TO OBEY ME!!!" but he does it with a nice little voice of a father who loves his children more than anything. If he didn't love us, he would let us keep worshiping the stupid calf.
So how about the concept of a balance between the fear of the Lord and the love of the Lord?? If we only have the fear, then we are legalistic. But if we only have the love, then we are way too lenient with sin. So we must have both. Jesus is my friend, but he is first my LORD. So that means that I cannot tell him "no" because that is a contradiction of terms. I cannot say "no, Lord." Obedience. Trust. Obedience. Trust. Learn to wait.
I went up to the altar to get prayer today and confessed that I have learned once again that I am an idiot. See, I am a first born control freak so I have issues with trusting God with things that are big, like my life. I tend to think that I know just a little more than the God of the Universe, the Alpha and Omega. Go figure. So I have an idea of how I think things should work out and I like to stick to that. Then God says "umm... no no." And then I pause and ask "well, why not??" And then God explains it to me and then after a long struggle I realize "hey, God is right!!" So this is a vicious cycle that has been going on for years now, and I keep putting myself in the same spot, thinking I know more than God. But, I never do. I always get rebuked and then I struggle and then eventually I obey. But why does it have to work like that?? Have you ever wondered what takes us so long??? Why can't I just say "YES, LORD" and then not have to go through the struggle?? Praise the Lord for his patience.
Happy Jesus' birthday. |
YOU ARE AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!